Starting college comes with a lot of exciting firsts, such as new classes, new friends, new routines and, for many students, a new roommate. One of the biggest housing decisions you’ll make before move-in day is whether to let the university assign a roommate or choose one yourself through social media, housing forums, or student groups.
Overview
- Whether you prefer an assigned roommate or one that you find yourself.
- Why there are no completely random roommates.
- How to properly find a roommate.
- The secret to your freshman-year roommate.
Step 1: Think About How Comfortable You Are Meeting New People
Be honest with yourself.
Do you love the idea of meeting someone completely new and seeing where the friendship goes? If so, a random roommate assignment could be a great fit. Many colleges use housing surveys that ask questions about sleep schedules, study habits, cleanliness, and lifestyle preferences. While no matching system is perfect, these questionnaires can help pair students with compatible living habits. Nothing will ever be completely random.
On the other hand, if the thought of sharing a room with a total stranger makes you nervous, choosing your own roommate may give you more peace of mind before arriving on campus.
- Am I excited by surprises?
- Do I adapt easily to new situations?
- Would I rather know who I’m living with ahead of time?
The answers to these questions can help you decide!
Step 2: Decide How Important Compatibility Is to You
Common misconception: choosing your own roommate guarantees compatibility, but that’s not always true!!
Just because someone has the same favorite music, follows the same TikTokers, or seems fun in a group chat doesn’t mean you’ll enjoy sharing a living space. Living together includes…
- Bedtimes
- Study habits
- Cleanliness
- Guests and visitors
- Noise levels
Many students who choose roommates through social media focus on common interests but forget to discuss daily routines. If you decide to pick your own roommate, have conversations about the less glamorous stuff before making it official. (That could even mean asking them if they snore!)
Step 3: Consider What Kind of College Experience You Want
Random roommates often introduce students to people they might never have met otherwise. Different backgrounds, interests, and experiences can lead to unexpected friendships and a broader social circle.
Choosing your own roommate can provide a built-in support system from day one. Walking into residence halls already knowing someone can make the transition to college feel less overwhelming. Think about your goals:
- Do you want to branch out and meet new people?
- Do you prefer having a familiar face from the start?
- Are you hoping to expand your comfort zone?
Neither answer is wrong. It’s all about what feels right for you.
Step 4: Be Realistic About Online First Impressions
Social media can be helpful when searching for potential roommates, but remember that profiles only show part of the picture. That student with the perfectly curated feed may be amazing. They may also be completely different in real life.
When using roommate forums, Instagram, or college housing apps, try asking questions that go beyond hobbies such as:
- What time do you usually go to sleep?
- Do you like studying in your room?
- How do you feel about having friends over?
- Are you generally organized or more laid back?
- What’s one thing you need to feel comfortable at home?
Step 5: Trust the Housing Survey Process
Many students underestimate how much thought colleges put into roommate assignments. But, they’re very advanced and thorough, taking into consideration:
- Patterbs and preferences
- Habits and hobbies
- Classes (which are often not covered by your social media selection)
- Necessary wake-up time
- Religious beliefs and necessities
While they cannot predict friendship, they can help reduce common conflicts related to lifestyle differences. If your school uses a detailed survey, random assignment may not be as random as it sounds. In many cases, the process is more accurately described as a compatibility match.
Step 6: Remember That Your First Roommate Doesn’t Have to Be Your Best Friend
The secret: The goal of a roommate is not necessarily to become your lifelong best friend. The goal is to create a comfortable living environment where both people can succeed.
Some roommates become inseparable. Others simply coexist respectfully and go on to make friends elsewhere. Both outcomes are completely normal. Don’t put too much pressure on the decision.
At the end of the day, there is no perfect formula for finding a great roommate. Whether you let your college make the match or choose someone yourself, communication, respect, and flexibility will matter far more than how you met.
College is full of surprises. Your roommate situation might just become one of the best stories you’ll tell for years to come.
